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[Oregon Taz]

Redneck Rules fo Gracious Living

1) A centerpiece for your dining table shouldn't be anything prepared by a taxidermist.

2) Don't let the dog eat at the table - no matter how good his manner are.

3) Refrain from yelling at people on the T.V. screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you.

4) Although uncomfortable - it's alright to wear shoes and socks to weddings.

5) Livestock is usually a poor choice for a wedding gift.

6) When drinking wine - make sure you tilt the cup and pour slowly so as to not to "bruise"   the fruit of the vine.

7) Never take a beer to a job interview - any job worth having will already have it stocked.

8) A well written prenuptial agreement always includes all the dogs, guns and non-running
vehicle bodies.

9) Refrain from whistling at women in church - wait until they are outside.

10) Carry a fly swatter on your dash to reach the kids in the back seat.

11) Always identify people in your yard - before shooting at them.

12) While ears should be cleaned reguarily...this job should be done using one's OWN truck keys.

But -
My audiologist says do not clean your ears, even with a Q-tip. Doing so can push ear wax back against the ear drum - BAD. He says ears are self cleaning, leave them alone.

Taz

[Sandra]

  I'm not a Redneck but I got a laugh anyway.

.
My audiologist says do not clean your ears, even with a Q-tip. Doing so can push ear wax back against the ear drum - BAD. He says ears are self cleaning, leave them alone.
Taz

PARDON!!

[MaxBeta]

  Ore Taz strikes again... pointing the finger at my suspect heritage.. which is actually includes native American "Royalty."

Being raised by a true philanthropist I did pick up on how to deal with strong opinions and not make the "misguided" accussations that normally appear.

Example(s)

As a kid I wanted a puppy..and saw one in a pet shop..they wanted $100 for the cute little guy.  My Father...had this to say about my request.

Money will buy this fine dog, but only your daily attention will make him wag his tail.

When I bought my first car..a sports car with bucket seats.. He sighed and peeked inside and made this observation.

The only trouble I see with  bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket..he never owned a car that had this type of seat.

When seat belts were introduced..he thought they were a great idea..I hated them, but conceded to his wisdom..his comment..seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.

One thing we shared was the hearing problem..and we both have been known to yell at the TV during a hotly contested sports event..maybe enough to qualify as a closet redneck ..well maybe

Btw..my dog had excellent table manners..better than some the kids for sure.  I could elaborate how and why...but I wouldn't want to upset the children.  hehe

[Lengo]

5) Livestock is usually a poor choice for a wedding gift.

Uh oh! I shoulda seen this thread before I went to that last wedding I went to. Oh well... I'm sure they made good use of the chickens and the goat. 

..and we both have been known to yell at the TV during a hotly contested sports event

I don't wait for the sports event. I yell at the commercials! (and stupid people in horror films, like "Don't open that door, ya big stoopid!")

 

[Sandra]

Money will buy this fine dog, but only your daily attention will make him wag his tail.
When I bought my first car..a sports car with bucket seats.. He sighed and peeked inside and made this observation.
The only trouble I see with  bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket..he never owned a car that had this type of seat.
When seat belts were introduced..he thought they were a great idea..I hated them, but conceded to his wisdom..his comment..seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.

Max your father was a very wise man, I particulary like the seatbelt comment

[MaxBeta]

  He would've been pleased that you thought that of him Sandra..though his humble nature would not allow him to believe it could be possible.  He did have a knack for expressing a clear minded point of view.

There's always individuals who impress or get your attention...in your formitive years, I'm lucky that he managed to do both for me.  ..and many others who knew him.

Ore Taz "rules" may not apply to people who are designated "city folk"...but it is strange that everyone can relate to the stigma of the redneck credo.  ..or as some have resorted in saying "ignorance is bliss"


 

[Sandra]

He would've been pleased that you thought that of him Sandra..though his humble nature would not allow him to believe it could be possible.  He did have a knack for expressing a clear minded point of view.

There's always individuals who impress or get your attention...in your formitive years, I'm lucky that he managed to do both for me.  ..and many others who knew him.

Ore Taz "rules" may not apply to people who are designated "city folk"...but it is strange that everyone can relate to the stigma of the redneck credo.  ..or as some have resorted in saying "ignorance is bliss"

Rednecks got their name from the bandanas they wore round their necks,(something about mining)
one of my American amigos told me that

[MaxBeta]

  Well there's not much mining around my area..but I can assure you..there's real Redneck's ..in the flesh.

I think it has to apply to a more broadened definition

Ask Ore Taz..her opinion

[Oregon Taz]

Well there's not much mining around my area..but I can assure you..there's real Redneck's ..in the flesh.

I think it has to apply to a more broadened definition

Ask Ore Taz..her opinion

What are your real rednecks like?

OK, you post your definition and I will post mine.   

I think it has to do with one's neck getting sunburned because of short hair.
Sort of the opposite of hippy. 
Really, I have no idea where the term came from. 

Taz

[MaxBeta]

  hehe.. Now Taz are you asking ME??  for a redneck definition..???  I really like your basic redneck logical observation. Just a plain ol sunburned neck that is red, end of story.

To me Redneck..has become a stigma toward a certain culture..guys like Jim Foxworthy have amassed their fortunes promoting such..defining moments of this created culture.  Then the rest of the world(ex. Aussies) have to get on the bandwagon..have their own homegrown "rednecks"..for whatever reason..they keep the stigma alive.

I simply thought that a redneck type of person was ultra conservative/patriotic, liked guns and hunting/fishing..strong opinion whether a white or blue collar worker. Alas.. Which fits directly into all the subjects that the humor "describing" a redneck.

 What happens is there's a forgotten GAP..as there's an even larger group of people who own guns..hunt and fish..but in no way fit into the mold that all the humor claims to authentize what's a real redneck.

We all enjoy the jokes..I confess I even have "applied" a few to myself..or people I know.  I think it's alright as long as we don't sub-humanize the recipients..  Uneducated people exist in all societies..and from every facet of society there's those who have connection to every cultural distinction.  I know this personally..I have relatives that span the entire spectrum..so in knowing this I can't escape "understanding" or "relating" to the endless quips.."..your a redneck when"  humor.

What it boils down to where I live now..is the clash between Liberal and Conservative ideologies.  The Conservative is automatically a redneck...the Liberal is labeled a "hippie".. kind of like your first comparison.

I'm as guilty as the next person for spreading redneck humor..like these.

NASCAR:
Non-Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks

..which I use frequently

In the news I see all the bad weather in the south..and as terrible as that is..I think of an email my brother sent me..

Question: What does a redneck divorce and a tornado have in common?
Answer: One way or the other someone is losing their trailer!

He got slapped ..for telling my mother this one..
Who was the first redneck in the Bible?
Cain because he married his sister.

..I would've warned him..but it was too late..I was still laughing too hard from his first quip..
That the best laundry bag is made by Hefty

I confess some of the jokes could be offensive..I'm as sensitive as the next person, but I do like to laugh..it's healthy even if I fit the humors direction.

Now it's your turn Taz...straighten me out ..if you need to.